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The Journey of Healing in Sex Addiction

“Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.”

 - Voltaire

The Wizard of Oz has long been a favorite story and metaphor of life for me.  I love the many metaphors contained within the story.  The tornado delivers Dorothy into a "call" she cannot avoid.  All Time Great Support GroupThe yellow brick road is an invitation to the journey of life and discovery of the mettle contained within oneself.  Along the journey Dorothy discovers other seekers who have been stuck in fear or shame for the “things” which they do not perceive to have within themselves.  They have feelings of brokeness, a yearning for courage, and wish for a completeness of self.  There is bonding in that brokeness, support for courage,  the capacity one needs to reach beyond fear, and sustenance for the journey in finding others who struggle.   

Sex Addiction Recovery and Super Heroes

On this day I had the luxury of sitting with a cup of coffee and taking in a bit of CNN as I began my day. umich.edu Dr. Sanjay Gupta was reporting his experience of giving the commencement address at his alma mater, Michigan University.  I was struck by the main message he wished to convey to these graduates.  His advice:  “Do one thing that you fear every day and become the action hero in your own life.”  Well said. 

That message applies for those working on recovery, as well. Fear is to recovery as Kryptonite was to Superman.  Many in recovery face actions that are fearful, yet, doing that fearful act can bring one to their own aid.  Reaching out to another peer with personal struggle, calling a sponsor for aid with the craziness in one’s own head, making an amends to those whom amends are owed can all be very scary acts indeed.  If you can work through the fear and take action imagine where that might lead you.  The sky is the limit!  

Entering Into the Pain of Transformational Change

"If you accept the pain, it cannot hurt you. The pain of making the necessary sacrifices always hurts more than you think it's going to. I know. It sucks. That being said, doing something seriously creative is one of the most amazing experiences one can have, in this or any other lifetime. If you can pull it off, it's worth it. Even if you don't end up pulling it off, you'll learn many incredible, magical, valuable things. It's NOT doing it when you know you full well you HAD the opportunity- that hurts FAR more than any failure."

- Hugh MacLeod

Where in the World is Matt Lauer: Some Thoughts for Addiction and Recovery

"Fortune favors the bold."  - Virgil

This past Thursday on NBC’s The Today Show Matt Lauer visited the Jungfrau Observatory in the Swiss Alps.  In this segment he met up with legendary climbers who reach great heights.  Specifically he focused on three climbers and their motivations, techniques, and focus used to climb the iconic north face of the Eiger Peak (elevation 13,000 feet).  All three men had something to say that reminded me of  the dangers of sex addiction and the sometimes unimaginable quest in reaching the summit of successful recovery. 

First, the story of John Harlen, the first American to climb the steep and craggy north face of the Eiger tells the tale of obsession, motivation, and the quest for redemption.  Four years after solidifying his place in history as the first American to climb the north face, Harlen died taking a more direct route up in 1962.  Sex addiction is a diesease of incresing escalating behaviors.  Some may die in the quest for even greater new heights.