The Two D’s in Sex Addiction Recovery

"Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality."   - Abraham Lincoln

In a previous post I have written about the two D’s in Sex Addiction:  Discovery and Disclosure.  This post will highlight the two D’s of Recovery. 

Recently, I was at my 5:15 a.m. spin class when the instructor shouted out “O.K. you got yourself here – that is the first part….now show us what you are made of!”  She talked about “the two D’s”:  Discipline and Drive.  First you have to show up, and while you are here….you must do the work and apply the energy.  These principles apply whether one wants to lose weight, plan for a triathlon, or finish an ironman.  

The Sex Addiction Cycle, The Super Bowl, and The Audi


During the recent Super Bowl Sunday “parade of super commercials” Audi had a commercial depicting a young man going to the Prom.  He was going to the prom alone.   In that determination to go alone he had several family members and friends taunting him with the words “no one goes to the Prom alone”.  Even his grade-school aged sister in the chorus of taunts says:  “Only losers go to the Prom alone.”  His dad offers him the key to the Audi as incentive and courage to go it alone.  The next scene flashes and we see him boisterously walking onto the stage to take the prom queen and whisk her off in the A4.  The final scene portrays the young man and the prom queen screaming in the thrill of going top speed in the A4.  The commercial ends with the slogan “Bravery.  It is what defines us.”

Beginning Care Workshop for Spouses

Beginning Care Workshop for Spouses in Relationships  Impacted by Sexual Addiction/Compulsivity

The Presents of Presence in Sex Addiction Recovery

Recovery wisdom advises: Never allow yourself to get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, (HALT).  On this morning’s 6-mile run, with my run partner out of town and running on less sleep than normal, I was hitting 2 out of 4 of the precautionary directives.  If I let my mind wander to “I have to do 6 miles today” the run seemed like an impossible task.  I wanted to walk.  I wanted to slow down.  My thoughts entered the realm of “stinking thinking” and the dreaded “I can’t do this”.  Ughhh.  I was tired.  I was alone.  I didn’t have my music.  I was becoming bored.  All the tell-tale signs of the wheels falling off the bus were at-risk for coming into play.